Your Date with The Internal Combustion Service

Have any of you Greenies actually asked yourselves what Mr. Gore has in mind when he talks about government intervention to control Global Warming? The following is slated for your not so distant future..

Joe Smith: Hello?
Internal Combustion Service Agent: Mr. Smith?
JS: Yes. Can I help you?
ICSA: Yes, sir. I am calling from the Internal Combustion Service.
JS: The What!?!
ICSA: Please do not play dumb with me, sir. As you are well aware, the ICS has been instituted by the Federal Government of your United States in order to protect the integrity of ‘The Federal Carbon Rationing Act’.
JS: Oh, that.
ICSA: Yes, sir. And I am calling you this evening in reference to your account from the previous calender year...
JS: Well, if in fact you are aware of my account, then you should also be aware that I have sent in the proper 1040CO2 short form. Properly signed and well before the April deadline.
ICSA: Yes, sir. The form itself is proper, as well as the signature and time stamp. But we have found some, let us just say, improprieties.
JS: Improprieties?
ICSA: Yes, sir. I am calling to advise you of an audit to your ‘Carbon Rations’ account.
JS: An audit?!?
ICSA: Yes, sir. As you are surely aware, each American citizen has only a limited amount of Carbon output available each calender year. Any overage in output must be equalized through the use of ‘Carbon Offsets’ or ‘Overage Purchases’ available only through proper ICS agencies.
Yours, sir, simply do not add up.
JS: According to you they don’t.
ICSA: Yes, sir. I will be needing from you all applicable receipts and or documents...
JS: Such as?
ICSA: Well, of course, all gas and oil receipts. Your home heating and electric bills. The make, model, and mileage information on all autos owned by you and your family. The number, weight, sex, and age of each family member along with their federally certified ‘Carbon Dioxide Breath Emissions’ numbers. A list of all electronic appliances and their cited power usage. Your furnace make and model and it’s efficiency rating. Square footage of your home. Square footage of your property along with the types and numbers of trees, grasses, and foliage therein...
JS: Is that all?
ICSA: No sir it is not. I will also need your ‘Job Specific Carbon Output’ if you are self employed. A list of all lawn machinery and maintenance equipment with all applicable efficiency ratings. A list of all motorized vehicles, including boats, ATVs, and children’s toys, and all applicable efficiency ratings. Quantities and types of all purchased food stuffs for the past year. You must make us aware of any physician verifiable gastrointestinal dysfunctions you or your family may suffer from. Total hourly usage as well as cord weight from the use of any fireplace or wood burning appliance. A full list of all battery operated appliances or miscellany and applicable efficiency ratings. And finally a list of all vacations and trips, with the modes of transportation therein, you and/or your family have taken within the last calender year.
JS: OK, I get it now. It’s just more massive government intrusion into the lives of ordinary citizens. Another bureaucracy to make criminals of decent hard working Americans.
ICSA: No need to get snippy, sir.
JS: No need/!? No need? This whole idea of man made Global Warming is now, and has always been, a scam invented by anti-Capitalists to increase the power of government. And low and behold we now have the Internal Combustion Service nosing into every corner of our lives.
ICSA: It’s for your own good, sir. And for the good of the planet. It’s for the children. You do care about the children, don’t you. A few small inconveniences now for the future of the children.
JS: This is a joke.
ICSA: No, sir, it is not. Fraud and/or lying to a Federal agent is serious business, sir. Punishable by fine and/or prison time.
JS: Oh, I understand the consequences, alright. I just wish our representatives in the government had understood them before enacting these fascist intrusive nanny-state laws. I truly do not think you are what our founding fathers had in mind when they conceived of a government limited in scope and by the people. I can not, nor ever will, understand the mind set of the masses who would gladly cede their rights simply for empty promises of safety and protection.
Even if we were to bring our Carbon usage down to absolute zero, do you really believe there would be no more hurricanes, tornadoes, glacial melting, and typhoons? Is anyone really that stupid? And when these things do come, as they surely will...what then? More stringent and tyrannical laws? Where does it end? Weather will always be with us, it always has and always will! And, unfortunately, so will those Utopian elitists who hunger for power as well as the weak minded sheep eager to be fed upon.
ICSA: I’m sorry sir, but that thirty second rant and the accompanying rise in your blood pressure and heart rate have increased your exhalation over and above your "Allowed Carbon Output’. This will have to be taken into account at the audit.
Again, I thank you sir, your appointment is for this Friday at 2:00 PM at the Federal Building on Main and 1st.

Solar Activity and Arctic Temperatures

This graph, courtesy Dr. Willie Soon, shows how solar activity and Arctic temperatures seem to have some correlation.

Now who would have thought that our sun had any control over the temperature here on Earth?

To hear Mr. Gore tell it, man is the major culprit of temperature change.

Then again, maybe he's just 'over-representing'.

As when he says...

I believe it is appropriate to have an over-representation of factual presentations on how dangerous [global warming] is, as a predicate for opening up the audience to listen to what the solutions are.

Global Warming Extremism

Global Warming zealotry is out of control.

‘No more room for argument,’ the "scientists" say. Is that you, Galileo, rolling over in your grave?

When activism trumps logic and common sense it can become extremism. And extremism often leads to self-delusion, conspiratorial thoughts and ideas, outright falsehoods, and fictional realities invented to protect the activists' world view.

This is now the case in the Global Warming arena. The zealots are loose in the world of weather.

And lest you doubt my sincerity, let us hear it from their own lips...

"A global climate treaty must be implemented even if there is no scientific evidence to back up the greenhouse effect."-Richard Benedick, an employee from the State Department working on assignment for the Conservation Foundation (from his report "Who Needs Evidence?").

"[W]e have to offer up scary scenarios, make simplified, dramatic statements, and make little mention of any doubts we may have. Each of us has to decide what the right balance is between being effective and being honest."-Stephen Schneider (quoted in "Our Fragile Earth" by Jonathan Schell)

"Unfortunately, very few people in America know the real name of Hurricane Katrina because the coal and oil industries have spent millions of dollars to keep the public in doubt about the issue."-Ross Gelbspan, author of ''The Heat Is On" and ''Boiling Point".

"Between the Greenland ice sheet and the Western Antarctic ice sheet the world could well be facing a 13 metre (43 foot) rise in sea level if we do not drastically curb our greenhouse gas emissions."-Greenpeace International

"We live in a country where more people care about the death of Anna Nicole Smith than the death(italics mine) of a planet."-Moderator Judy Muller, a long-time NPR contributor and associate professor at the University of Southern California's Annenberg School of Journalism.

"Never mind what you've heard about global warming as a slow-motion emergency that would take decades to play out. Suddenly and unexpectedly, the crisis is upon us. From heat waves to storms to floods to fires to massive glacial melts, the global climate seems to be crashing around us."-CNN.com

"It's surreal to have pre-eminent scientists tell us very seriously that civilization as we know it is over. The scale is unprecedented. It touches every aspect of life."-ABC News correspondent Bill Blakemore.

"(T)he science is clear. We need not a 20% cut by 2020; not a 60% cut by 2050, but a 90% cut by 2030."-George Monbiot, journalist for The Guardian newspaper.

"The science is clear. This month, a study published in the journal Nature by a renowned MIT climatologist linked the increasing prevalence of destructive hurricanes to human-induced global warming."-Robert F. Kennedy Jr.

"The climate is crashing, and global warming is to blame."-Time magazine.

"Unless we announce disasters no one will listen."-Sir John Houghton, first chairman of IPCC.

"Indeed, when we wake up 20 years from now and find that the Atlantic Ocean is just outside Washington, D.C., because the polar icecaps are melting, we may look back at this pivotal election. We may wonder whether it wasn't the last moment when a U.S. policy to deal with global warming might have made the difference, and we may ask why the party most concerned about that, the Greens, helped to elect Mr. Bush by casting 97,000 Nader votes in Florida."-Thomas L. Friedman of the New York Times.

"I would like to say we're at a point where global warming is impossible to deny. Let's just say that global warming deniers are now on a par with Holocaust deniers, though one denies the past and the other denies the present and future."-Boston Globe's Ellen Goodman.

"They were experiencing temperatures that weren't expected with global warming. But one of the things we see with global warming is unpredictability."-Ann Atwood, organizer of an expedition to the North Pole to bring attention to Global Warming...which had to be called off due to extreme cold after one of the explorers suffered frostbite.

"If Greenland melted or broke up and slipped into the sea, sea levels worldwide would increase by between 18 and 20 feet."-Al Gore.

"Global warming is too big a problem to be solved by energy experts alone. It’s about people. It’s about how many of us there are and how we choose to live our modern lives. It’s about the very personal decisions we make about whether, when, and how many children we choose to have. We can start by supporting the notion that every woman and every couple should have the resources and power to control their own reproductive lives."-John Seager, national president of Population Connection, formerly Zero Population Growth.

"When we've finally gotten serious about global warming, when the impacts are really hitting us and we're in a full worldwide scramble to minimize the damage, we should have war crimes trials for these bastards — some sort of climate Nuremberg."-Dr. Heidi Cullen,, climatologist for the Weather Channel.

"A quarter of all species of plants and land animals, or more than a million in all, could be driven to extinction."-Chris Thomas, professor of Conservation Biology at England’s University of Leeds.

"Global warming has largely been blamed for the survival and spread of the Asian Hornet, Vespa velutina, which is thought to have arrived in France from the Far East in a consignment of Chinese pottery in late 2004."-Telegraph.co.uk.

"It's most likely to be the...warmer climate."-Martyn Robinson from the Australian Museum on why the Australian house cockroach, methana marginalus which likes warmer climates, has begun moving in.

"Before this century is over, billions of us will die and the few breeding pairs of people that survive will be in the Arctic."-James Lovelock, scientist, author, researcher, environmentalist and futurologist.

"If humans pursue a business-as-usual course for the first half of this century, I believe the collapse of civilisation due to climate change becomes inevitable."-Tim Flannery author of "The Weather Makers".

"Climate extremes would trigger meteorological chaos -- raging hurricanes such as we have never seen, capable of killing millions of people; uncommonly long, record-breaking heat waves; and profound drought that could drive Africa and the entire Indian subcontinent over the edge into mass starvation. ... Even if we could stop all greenhouse gas emissions today, we would still be committed to a temperature increase worldwide of two to four degrees Fahrenheit by the middle of the twenty-first century. It would be warmer then than it has been for the past two million years. Unchecked it would match nuclear war in its potential for devastation."-Former Democratic Senator George J. Mitchell.

"Malaria, one of Africa's leading killers, is spreading to higher altitudes because of rising temperatures. The Sahara is expanding, turning farmland into desert and contributing to conflicts like the one in the Darfur region of Sudan. And the list goes on."-Jeffrey Gettleman, East Africa bureau chief of The New York Times.

"The current global population growth rate outpaces even our best efforts to reduce carbon emmissions. Learn what else can be done to bring this global problem under control, and what you can do to make a difference...Global warming and the destruction of wildlife habitat are just two environmental concerns that tie directly to global population growth."-Quote from the National Wildlife Federation website.

"Population is the underlying problem - the catalyst for the whole thing, but we didn't get into that in the film. That is the underlying problem - too many people..."-Karen Coshof, producer of "The Great Warming"-a documentary on Global Warming.

"We all may be sneezing, sniffling, and scratching more in decades to come, due to global warming."-From an article on WebMD by Saylynn Boyles on June 6, 2006 on Global Warming worsening allergies.

"If we continue our present growth path we are facing extinction - not in millions of years, or even millennia, but by the end of this century."-Peter Barrett, director of Victoria University's Antarctic Research Centre.

"Freedom to breed will bring ruin to us all."-Garrett Hardin, a leading ecologist.

"Us homo sapiens are turning out to be as destructive a force as any asteroid. Earth’s intricate web of ecosystems thrived for millions of years, as natural paradises, till we came along...The stark reality is that there are simply too many of us. And we consume way too much. Especially here at home...The solutions are not a secret: control population, recycle, reduce consumption..."-Matt Lauer MSNBC.

"Every time someone dies as a result of floods in Bangladesh, an airlines executive should be dragged out of his office and drowned."-George Monbiot, journalist for The Guardian newspaper.

"As global warming melts the world's ice sheets, rising sea levels are not the only danger. Viruses hidden for thousands of years may thaw and escape - and we will have no resistance to them."-From The Independent/UK by Kate Ravilious.

"This is an emergency...It's a frightening thing...It'll make world war look like heaven."-John Edwards, Democratic candidate for President of the United States.

"Global Warming is a universal issue. It will cause famine, disease, war, death and suffering."-Headline from Democratic Underground.

And lastly...and this is what the whole human induced Global Warming scare is all about...

"The answer to global warming is in the abolition of private property and production for human need."-Louis Proyect, programmer in the Administrative Information Services department Columbia University.

Are You a Critical Thinker

If you have seen Al Gore's film "An Inconveniant Truth" and have not watched "The Global Warming Swindle" you owe it to what is left of your soy drenched brain to see it. If you do not, your ideas have no basis in true science and you should be ashamed of yourself. You are not an intellectual, you are not a scientist, you are not even a thinker...you are a zealot.

UPDATE: Oddly, the original URL used for "The Global Warming Swindle" above has been made "unavailable" by Google. Go here instead.