Tuesday, September 19, 2006

The NeoCon...Spirator

There was a time not so long ago when the aluminum hat wearing crowd would play their schizophrenic mind games quietly alone in their basements. Or, at least with widely scattered groups of their fellow deniers of reality.
Sadly, those days are long gone.
For there is a new breed of conspiracy buff. One I will here dub the Neo-ConSpiracy Nut.
With his recent appearance in our midst, the Neo-ConSpiracy Nut has raised the level of insanity and lowered the level of public discourse throughout our entire society. Worse yet, his arrival has made all our lives somewhat more dangerous.
There have always been those among us who have been drawn to the conspiratorial. Those tempted towards a belief in unseen forces at work behind the scenes controlling and manipulating, most if not all, of human endeavors.
But today it is different. For today we are witness to a confluence of groups and philosophies that together embody a new and growing threat.
So from what dark cesspool has this new breed of beast arisen?
We begin in the sixties with the emergence of the anti-establishment community. This group had the mind-set that any established norms and all standing authority must be first questioned and ultimately disrespected. In their twenties during the sixties, today this group makes up a vocal majority in the Liberal Democratic portion of the party. They have, unfortunately, brought their sixties mind set with them into the 21st century.
The startling thing about this group is their vitriolic unflinching hatred of George W. Bush. The loathing they have for the sitting American President goes far beyond any level of logical political disagreement. They abhor the man for his simple existence.
This blind unbending hatred causes them to believe the worst of intent in any of this man’s actions. It is only secondly they search for the ‘data’ and ‘proof’ to back up their preconceived views. This is the very process that is the building block of the conspiratorial thinker...Unstable theory followed by a rebuilding of history.
So let us move on the next group in our little ensemble-‘the peace-at-all-costs’ crowd.
A group of humans who would gladly sacrifice the lives of you and your family for their John Lennon’s “Imagine” view of Earthly utopia. A group who long ago lost its ability, and/or its will, to discern the difference between right and wrong, between good and evil. And it is this very attribute that makes them prime fodder for conspiratorial thinking. When one sees no difference between the good and the evil, it is easy to imagine evil intent in the good. And again, then find the ‘facts’ to back such suppositions up.
Next we meet the ‘fear of reality’ sect. This group lives live’s of constant denial. Afraid to face any reality that has the hint of responsibility or danger. They will happily and unquestioningly believe nearly anything as long they feel protected and free from obligation.
And now we have the last ingredient, the ever present paleo-conspiracy nut. The axle that drives the wheels. He has always been with us, has always done his dirty little work. He brings an innate ability to weave facts and pseudo-facts into a web of his own alternate reality.
He is relished by the Bush haters as he builds the framework for such presumptions of the President’s evil intent as:
-Bush and his regime planned and executed the horrors of September 11, 2001.
-Bush allowed the Saudi royal family to fly out of the US after 9-11.
-Bush’s religious foundation drives him to move the country toward a theocracy and the world toward the ‘end times’.
-Bush and his cronies are listening to all your personal phone calls.
How is the paleo-conspiratorial nut acknowledged by the ‘peace-at-all-costs’ sect? He puts together the background for their insanity, as well. In instances such as:
-Bush’s ‘war for oil’.
-Bush attacked Iraq and Saddam as revenge for the attempted assassination of his father.
-Bush attacked Afghanistan only to enrich his oil buddies who needed a pipeline through that country.
And finally we come to the ‘fear of reality’ gang. Their fears of Islamo-Fascist global conquest, and their own responsibility therein, are eased if:
- 9-11 was in fact and inside job.
-Bush created the war on terror in order to back up his invasions of Afghanistan and Iraq in order to enrich his oil buddies.
-the CIA is behind most, if not all, of what have been deemed terrorist attacks.

It must be noted here that many of these groups have been overlapping for some time and individual members may have been members in one, some, or in all groups at one point in their lives. Which brings up an interesting question...Why is the Neo-ConSpiratorial Nut most always Left of center?

So these are our groups and these are the ideas that connect them, but where is the danger?
It is mostly this, the conspiratorial mind often borders on the schizophrenic. It denies historic reality for a preferred version of its own reality. It loses its ability to reason or be reasoned with. It sees connections where there are none. Intent where there is none. Manipulation where it does not exist.
And it now has the power to bring others into its web of intrigue. In the past, believers of these inane scenarios were few and far between. But the merging together of these groups and others like them has increased their numbers to a significant and vocal level. And with the emergence of the internet, the media’s love of controversy, and the 24 hour news cycle; the ideas fomented by those with this mind set more easily get out for public consumption.
So if there is a danger here, what can we do?
It is up to those of us in the true ‘reality based community’ to stand up to this maelstrom of insanity. We must ignore, berate, and/or shame any that we encounter who choose to lower themselves and the level of civility to the point of unreality. We must attempt to aim those who would be tempted to conspiracy towards reality with facts and logic. And last, we must ourselves continue to hone our ability to recognize the true from the temptingly easy. We must not ourselves fall into the web of the Neo-ConSpiracy Nut.

Saturday, September 16, 2006

They Just Need a Hand Up

With gas prices dipping below two dollars a gallon in many areas throughout the United States and with record losses looming in the fourth quarter of 2006, many of the movers and shakers of 'Big Oil' are taking preemptive action. More and more there are whispers of lay offs, pump station closings, and even bankruptcies murmuring through the entire oil industry. Exxon-Mobil, and others, intend to go straight to those in the power circles of government to plead for a helping hand...a hand up, if you will.
We here at Sticks and Stones, self-professed shills for the oil companies, have procured exclusive access to a letter sent by these aggrieved organizations to certain members of the US Senate. Edward Kennedy, John F. Kerry, Dick Durbin, and Barbara Boxer are but a few of the officials to receive this mailing and we at this blog are confident in the compassionate governance of these individuals.
That said, here is the letter...

Dear sirs,
We of ‘Big Oil’ are today facing down a most dire of futures.
Every day, it seems, per barrel price plummets and our losses soar.
The business of extracting oil from the planet, as you are surely aware, is a very specialized enterprise. Very few companies have either the means or the ability to succeed in such an endeavor. It would be not only a shame, but certainly dangerous to national security for certain companies to be forced to dissolve.
Let it be said that we as an industry have done all we could in order to avoid the necessity of this correspondence. We have literally begged the people of this great nation to pay more for gas in order to help us in our hour of need. Our requests, sadly, seemed to have fallen on deaf ears. And our calls for aid to Bill O’Reilly have, as yet, gone unreturned.
So it is that we turn to you, members of the esteemed Democratic wing of the US Senate. You who only recently have attempted to enact a windfall profits tax. A tax, you claimed, aimed to help those in need. We are now here to ask, nay to demand, that the government of the United States return to those of us in the oil business all the losses we may incur in the fourth quarter of the 2006 business year.
As it is obviously within your power and your will to take from one group and give to another in the guise of compassion; it would seem common sense that you could simply tax those who are now paying less for a gallon of gasoline and remit the accumulated tax dollars to those of our companies who are currently in need.
We of ‘Big Oil’ have the ultimate faith in your humanity and disregard those who would label you with the tag of hypocrites. We are sure you will do the right thing and work toward resolving our ever approaching decent into poverty.


Chevron Corp.
British Petroleum
Royal Dutch Shell

We here at Sticks and Stones also have faith in the honor of our Democratic friends in Congress, and can hardly wait for the upcoming debate on the floor of the US Senate.