Howard Dean Will Be Here All Week

I awoke this morning just absolutely stunned by what Governor Dean said yesterday. What is it now, you ask? Well, nothing as far as I know...but that in itself is an aberration of late. Seriously, the man is just plain out of control. Someone needs to reign him in or at the very least increase his meds. Hey, he’s a doctor isn’t he? Hmm, maybe a little self medication? Or maybe that's the problem in the first place.

Hey, just for fun, why don’t we have a giggle or two at the fine Governor’s expense. Let’s take a little stroll down memory lane, enjoy a little nostalgia if you will...

I hate the Republicans and everything they stand for.

This from the leader of ‘The Party of Compassion’?

Republicans are "a pretty monolithic party. They all behave the same. They all look the same. It's pretty much a white Christian party...The Republicans are not very friendly to different kinds of people.

Maybe the loving Governor should tell that to Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, ex-Secretary of State Colin Powell, soon to be Appellate Judge Janet Brown, Attorney General Alberto Gonzalez, HUD Secretary Alphonso Jackson, Secretary of Commerce Carlos Gutierrez, Secretary of Labor Elaine Chao, Supreme Court Judge Clarence Thomas, etc.

You think people can work all day and then pick up their kids at child care or wherever and get home and still manage to sandwich in an eight-hour vote? Well Republicans, I guess can do that. Because a lot of them have never made an honest living in their lives.

Millions of Republican small business owners, who daily put their entire lives into their businesses, just love to hear that from you, Dear Mr. Dean.

I still want to be the candidate for guys with Confederate flags in their pickup trucks.

Hmm, how did that whole going after the toothless redneck vote work out for you, sir?

On Bush and 9/11...

I don't know. There are many theories about it. The most interesting theory that I've heard so far, which is nothing more than a theory, I can't-- think it can't be proved, is that he was warned ahead of time by the Saudis.

Here is a ‘nothing more than a theory’ for you...you’re a moron.

The Republicans have the best propaganda out there since Lenin, and they just make stuff up and they keep repeating it, and hope people are going to believe it.

Hey Mr. Dean you missed one...you forgot to tell us how Guantanamo is exactly like the Gulag.

Interesting that you said the following about one man who has never faced trial...

I think Tom DeLay ought to go back to Houston, where he can serve his jail sentence down there.

Yet this about another...

I've resisted pronouncing a sentence before guilt is found. I will have this old-fashioned notion that even with people like Osama, who is very likely to be found guilty, we should do our best not to, in positions of executive power, not to prejudge jury trials.

And who can ever forget this classic?

You know what? You know something? You know something? If you had told us one year ago that we were going to come in third in Iowa, we would have given anything for that....
And you know something? You know something? Not only are we going to New Hampshire, we're going to South Carolina and Oklahoma and Arizona and North Dakota and New Mexico! We're going to California and Texas and New York! And we're going to South Dakota and Oregon and Washington and Michigan! And then we're going to Washington, D.C.. To take back the White House!
We will not give up. We will not give up in New Hampshire. We will not give up in South Carolina. We will not give up in Arizona or New Mexico, Oklahoma, North Dakota, Delaware, Pennsylvania, Ohio, Michigan! We will not quit now or ever! We want our country back for ordinary Americans. And we're going to win in Massachusetts! And North Carolina! And Missouri! And Arkansas! And Connecticut! And New York! And Ohio!

And that was just for coming in fourth in Iowa..imagine if he’d lost the Presidential election....Thank God for the Brady Bill.

But alas help is on the way...

GuruMaker President Harrison Monarth has spontaneously offered to provide Howard Dean with free private speech coaching sessions, to help him maintain the credibility and trust his public office inspires. Says Monarth, “We would like to show him a communications strategy that would still enable him to 'rally his base' and win hearts and minds with his message, but without having to resort to counterproductive rhetorical tactics like name-calling and 'labeling.' “Clearly,” adds Monarth, “Howard Dean’s attack-language often backfires as he’s had to dig himself from one hole out of another in the last few weeks.”

But in order to get help, you must admit you have a problem in the first place...

Democratic Party boss Howard Dean under fire for blunt comments about Republicans, refused to back down on Wednesday and said Republican critics were trying to divert attention from their own failures..."It's pretty hard to deny that predominantly that's what the Republican Party looks like. It is a party controlled by the conservative Christian agenda," the former Vermont governor said, adding "I'm a white Christian myself."

So don’t give up on your marionette yet, Karl Rove. There still is hope.