Live From My Hotel Room

If you are anything like me, and pray to God you’re not, then you must be having a bit of a time trying to get your mind around the disparity in the description our soldiers give of the situation in Iraq and how our media reports it. It is truly a puzzle. The soldiers nearly all positive while the media heavily negative.
I believe, however, I have figured out how such a divergence exists. The so-called journalists in Baghdad never leave their hotels. And how did I come to such an enlightened conclusion? Bear with me as I lay it bear.
I have noticed, while watching local news...something I try hard to avoid...that the reporters love to ‘Go Live!’. I mean they just love it! And for the slightest of reasons. Even if the story is as old and dead as Ted Kennedy’s liver.

“We go live to Tom Smith, standing in front of the White Castle on El Domain Boulevard. Tom, what’s happening out there?”
“Well, nothing at the moment, Jane. But yesterday two young men were taken by ambulance to the nearby St. Patrick’s Hospital. Apparently, after a late night of drinking Jack Daniels and Southern Comfort, they stopped for a couple bags of burgers. And let’s just say, what happened next was just not pretty....”
“So, Tom, is there some new information, an update to the story?”
“Noooo...........”

I am sure if you have spent any time transfixed as I have, by the inanity of your local news, you have seen much the same thing. They go live at the drop of a hat.
And here is where my theory kicks in. Why do we not see more ‘live’ stories from Iraq? No ‘live’ feeds of a reporter standing in front of a burning Humvee in Fallujah. No Wolfe Blitzer signing in ‘live’ from the latest disaster in Mosul.
They are afraid to leave their hotels. So they sit together sipping their French wine, dreaming of ways to bring down a president.